Imperfect Action

Coach Eva and Coach Mary, two of my current coaches in a training program I am participating in, talk often about Imperfect Action.

I get this concept - that taking imperfect action is better then taking no action at all - but I still stumble with it sometimes.

My own inner critic and perfectionist would really like for everything I do and say to be perfect the first time out. What if someone sees or notices my mistakes?

Well, I've been practicing taking Imperfect Action more and more these days as I continue to shift and grow my business and create some new, exciting programs for working moms.

One way I practice is through this blog. In the past I have not blogged as often as I think about it or would like because I have gotten caught up in wanting the post to be "perfect" (i.e. well-written, interesting to everyone, humorous, life-changing, and exempt to any typos). If I didn't feel like I had time to write the "perfect post" then I often didn't write anything.

Now I am practicing just writing what comes to mind and from my heart. Yes, I'd still like for others to feel that my entries are well-written, interesting, humorous and life-changing, but I really can't control what others will think of my writing.

As far as the entries being exempt from typos...well, I have a bit more control over that. However, the typos will still happen. In fact, I had one reader kindly point out a typo in my last entry. She was nice to only point out one, as I ended up finding a handful when I went back through it. When I got the email indicating the typo, part of me cringed. It poked that place within me that thinks if something isn't worth being done right then it's not worth being done at all. It also poked that place that says, "SH*T, now someone knows that I am not perfect!"

But there's a bigger part of me now who is willing to embrace the typo (only after I corrected it, of course) and see it in the bigger context that I AM HUMAN! I too make mistakes. Some small, like a few typos on a blog post that isn't read by a ton of people (yet!). Some bigger, like racking up credit card debt or running the brand-new van into a pole or...okay, I'll stop there.

So, today I embrace my Imperfect Actions. May each of them lead me in the direction of my own imperfectly-perfect vision and life direction.

• What actions are you holding back from taking out of fear of not doing it perfectly?
• What one, small action are you willing to take TODAY, even if it's imperfect, that aligns with your heart, your goals, and your vision for your brilliant life?

Got sleep?

It’s no secret that getting sleep is a good thing, and the impacts of not getting enough are huge. It’s also not a secret that many people don’t get enough sleep, especially working moms. Although it’s one of the most important ingredients to living a happy and healthy life, it often falls to the bottom of the list when you are a busy parent juggling the complexities of both the personal and professional areas of your life.

On a personal note, last night I had a crappy night of sleep. I had trouble falling asleep, I had trouble staying asleep, and when I was asleep my brain was still going a mile-a-minute, which made me wish I wasn’t asleep. So, while I laid in bed this morning wishing that I felt a bit better rested and wondering how I was going to get through the day without snapping someone’s head off, I made a mental note of my plan for tonight based on what I know has worked for me in the past.

1. Commit to being in bed by 9:30 p.m. and light off by 10:00 p.m. NO MATTER WHAT! This was my intention last night, but darn that laundry needed to be folded and then I got sucked into American Idol (which I never watch).
2. Turn off the computer and stop all things work related at least one hour before going to bed (which means 8:30 p.m.). You know how it goes, you plan to do “just one more thing” for work and then that turns into that and then you remember that and the next thing you know you’ve spent two hours on the computer instead of the thirty minutes you intended to just finish a small project. Last night for me it was getting caught up in figuring out how to set up a feed subscription for my blog (Note: which you can now do on the right!). It was not surprise that my dreams where about RSS feeds and my half-awake-half-asleep thoughts were in trying to figure it all out. My brain is working on overtime enough when I am awake, I don’t need it trying to work when I am asleep.
3. Drink a warm (not hot) cup of milk thirty minutes before bedtime (which means 9:00 p.m.). Note to self: this does not mean a cup of warm milk with chocolate in it and whipped cream on top, which is what I had last night.
4. Exercise in the morning, which improves my sleep by the end of the day.
5. Allow for at least twenty minutes of no-brainer reading before turning out the light (which means 9:40 p.m.). I often use this time to read a coaching, professional development or self-help book for work purposes. The problem with this is that my brain then starts swirling with ideas and it’s hard to calm it down. On the other hand, when I pick up a no-brainer book or magazine, I find that I can barely keep my eyes open ten minutes later.
6. Crack window to allow for cool fresh air in the room, which always helps with my sleep.
7. Spend a few minutes with the light out, my head on the pillow, and my eyes shut to visualize how I want to feel the next day (i.e. healthy, happy, present, energetic, focused, etc.). For I have come to learn that regardless of what my sleep looks like from night to night, the point of my desire for good sleep is to feel a certain way. Sometimes I can feel this way with a night that hasn’t gone so great. And other times I can sleep through the entire night soundly, and wake up feeling like I’ve been hit by a bus.
   

As a parent you know that nights can sometimes be unpredictable. Creating (and sticking to) a sleep plan for yourself that supports you in feeling the way you want to feel during the day is a valuable exercise. But that’s only one piece of the equation. If you haven’t helped your child(ren) learn healthy sleep habits, it will be challenging for you to stick to yours.

I’ll get on my “Children Need Healthy Sleep Habits” soapbox in the next post. Until then, I dare you to put a plan in writing that will help you get more and better sleep. Try it for two weeks straight and let me know how you feel!

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And If you’re interested in a blog all about sleep, check out Snoozester. It's got some great links to recent and relevant articles and studies around adult and child sleep.

Photos Tell Powerful Stories

A client of mine just shared with me this piece she wrote as a way of expressing her deep emotion around the recent disasters in Asia. I was moved to tears by it and asked if I could share it here. I am happy to say that she said yes.

Photos tell powerful stories, and I have been struck in recent days by three sets of photographs. All feature similar subjects but in vastly different circumstances.

In one group of photos, taken by teachers in my daughter’s daycare, the toddlers are busy doing art projects, reading books, and going on walks in the California sunshine. The kids are adorable, engrossed in the water fountain on campus and making paper flowers for Mother’s Day.

In another set of photos, a similarly adorable group of young children gathers around a tent, a makeshift shelter in central China. Their orphanages were deemed unsafe following the earthquake and its aftershocks. The teachers and nannies care for not only their current charges but also incoming children, newly orphaned by the disaster.

In the final set of photos, the most disturbing, children’s gray-blue bodies are washed up on the shores of the Irrawaddy River or lined up for identification in the hard-hit area of Burma’s delta.

These scenes strike a chord professionally and personally. I work with an organization that researches human rights abuses and attitudes toward justice and social reconstruction following mass atrocities. Close colleagues were in Burma when the storm struck, and they saw the devastation firsthand. They helped deliver supplies and assisted local organizations to monitor the sham referendum choreographed by the junta.

China’s tragedy also hit close to home. We adopted our daughter from the stricken region nearly two years ago and spent a week in Chongqing, breathing diesel fumes in the sweltering heat. I look at her in the photo with her current classmates and imagine how easily she could be among the children now sleeping in tents, or worse.

The events in Asia seem overwhelming and beyond any one person’s capacity to assist in a meaningful way. So what can be done?

For my own sake, I am motivated to do three things:

1. Give what I can to relief efforts. I am grateful to people on the ground providing what aid and comfort are possible.
2. Actually make an emergency plan with my family. Earthquakes and powerful storms are imminent possibilities here on the edge of the ocean.
3. Squeeze my daughter a little more, tell her I love her and I am glad she is part of my life in this fortunate part of the world.

Written by Camille C.

Small action. Big relief.

It’s amazing how taking one rather small, simple action can provide you with such big relief.

After losing all our computer files a number of years ago when my laptop was stolen (and no backup had been done), my husband and I have been discussing the need for a regular backup process. Every so often one of us would burn certain files onto a CD, but with no regularity and we were never quite sure we were saving all that we needed.

When discussing the back-up issue with a friend a couple of months ago, he told me about an online site that he uses, www.mozy.com. I was intrigued by how simple he told me it was and the fact that for a relatively low monthly fee ($4.95, in fact), the program could be set up to run at a certain time every month without me even thinking about it.

Let me say right now that I get nothing for mentioning this service. It’s really just a testament of finding a simple, low-cost service which provides me a *great* deal of relief.

After asking this friend numerous times to remind me the name of the website (I don’t have the best memory), I finally requested that he send me the web address in an email so I wouldn’t forget again; which he did. And there it sat in my inbox for another couple of weeks.

Well, not anymore. This morning I found the email, clicked on the link, briefly reviewed the site, gave them my payment information, downloaded the software and now my computer is going through it’s initial backup process. Great. Done. Something else to check off my to-do list.

But what I am amazed about is the amazing feeling I have of a weight having been lifted from my shoulders. It wasn’t until I signed-up for this service that I realized how much *not* having any backup was weighing on me. In the back of mind I was carrying the concern (more like sheer terror) of what would happen if our computer crashed today.

Today was such a reminder about how taking the simple actions we keep putting off on the things that we don’t necessarily *want* to do but that we are thinking about anyway can free up mental and emotional energy. Now I can take that energy that went towards the, “What would we do if our computer crashed?” and direct it towards more of what I want in my life.

Maybe the will or home emergency kit I’ve been trying not to think about (but do anyways) should be next.